I plugged 16 shells from a thirty-ought-six
and a Black Crow snuck through a hole in the sky
so I spent all my buttons on an old pack mule
and I made me a ladder from a pawn shop marimba
and I leaned it up against a dandelion tree

And I filled me a satchel full of old pig corn
and I beat me a billy from an old French horn
and I kicked that mule to the top of the tree
and I blew me a hole 'bout the size of a kickdrum
and I cut me a switch from a long branch elbow

I'm gonna whittle you into kindlin'
Black Crow 16 shells from a thirty-ought-six
whittle you into kindlin'
Black Crow 16 shells from a thirty-ought-six

Well I slept in the holler of a dry creek bed
and I tore out the buckets from a red Corvette,
tore out the buckets from a red Corvette
Lionel and Dave and the Butcher made three
you got to meet me by the knuckles of the skinnybone tree
with the strings of a Washburn stretched like a clothes line
you know me and that mule scrambled right through the hole

Now I hold him prisoner in a Washburn jail
that stapped on the back of my old kick mule
strapped it on the back of my old kick mule
I bang on the strings just to drive him crazy
I strum it loud just to rattle his cage
strum it loud just to rattle his cage

I'm gonna whittle you into kindlin'
Black Crow 16 shells from a thirty-ought-six
whittle you into kindlin'
Black Crow 16 shells from a thirty-ought-six